Question from reader : “How to approach when she has headphones?”

There is this girl who normally comes to the garden to take a walk.
She either has a friend with her or she comes alone. But whenever she
comes alone she is listening to music on her mobile thru her headphones.
Sometimes even i go with my friend to take a walk. I wanna approach
this girl but dont hav d balls. Pl help.

– Daksh, Mumbai

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Daksh, if you’ve never approached a girl and don’t even know
the basics of approaching, then I cannot teach you everything in
one blog post.

Please sign up for our eCoaching program and at least get the basics.

If you have approached girls before and are facing difficulty ONLY
with this particular girl wearing headphones, then read on…

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How to approach a girl with headphones or
who is busy on the phone

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Girls are usually uncomfortable standing alone, doing nothing.
Especially if they are in a public place.

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Reason? It makes them easy targets for the creepy guys
who ogle at her or even harass her.

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That’s why girls who are waiting for a friend in a public place,
will usually pretend to be “busy”.

Either she’ll talk on the phone or listen to music on headphones.

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Most guys don’t bother girls who are “busy” because they don’t
have the balls.

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So how do you approach such a girl?

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The same way you approach other girls, with one difference :
before you say anything, motion her to remove her headphones or
to stop talking on the phone.

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Then, when you have her attention, deliver your opener as you usually do.

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As simple as that.

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This works for 2 reasons :

1. It displays confidence. In her experience, no guy approaches her when she
   has her headphones on or when she’s on the phone. So the guy who does
   approach is instantly marked as gutsy.
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2. When you treat her headphones (or her phone conversation) as no big deal,
   she’ll treat it as no big deal too.

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You’re probably thinking, Oh my God, won’t she be pissed if I disturb her?

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Well, you’ll be pleasantly surprised. In  fact, girls will often abruptly cut their
phone call (or remove headphones) to talk to you. She’s glad she can finally stop
pretending to be busy and talk to someone interesting while waiting for her friend.

She also enjoys the social validation that comes from the fact that a guy considered
her attractive enough to approach. Provided,  of course, you approach like a real man.

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Note : Sometimes a girl could be on an important call, obvious from the intensity
of her body language and voice. If so, move on and approach her later if you can.
And sometimes, a girl will refuse to cut her call short even if you ask her to. If so,
just move on. No big deal.

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